December 31st 2010 (written yesterday).
So I awoke on New Year's eve thinking about clinic stats and feeling ashamed for texting Dr P after midnight with some ramblings about live birth rates. No reply. It was 09.00. Then my period started and quite obviously too. These days, it seems to hint it's coming for a day or two before so I was surprised, especially as isn't due until the 2nd Jan. I waited half an hour, nervous about the possibility of starting treatment and still uncomfortable about calling the Doctor on his mobile when he is off duty.
Dr P answered his phone, short of breath from jogging in the park and I said sorry about 4 times and went into too much detail about the colour and consistency or my menstrual flow. He suggested we meet at the clinic for a scan or I could see his colleague there tomorrow. I decided today was the day even though I would have liked more preparation before revealing my nether regions to 2 consultants.
Within an hour I have my legs in stirrups and Dr P is checking out my ovary with a magic trans vaginal wand thingy. It takes several long minutes before he says 'left ovary OK' and then several seconds drag by and he says 'right ovary OK'. Dr H (the big cheese) rises from his chair to look at the screen. Dr P and Dr H switch back to Spanish and all I can understand is 'no but..on the left there...show me the right agin...well....of course....no but and no but' , my heart is racing again until Dr H says 'we can start tomorrow, your cycle has ended the year nicely for you'.
I agree, shoes and knickers back on, I am shown into another room but not before Dr H gives me an obligatory kiss on the left cheek (it doesn't matter who you are here, male or female, if you've met once already you are on 'kissing terms'). Next door, Dr P gets a dummy injector pen out and demonstrates it's use. It seems just like an insulin pen and I feel OK with it. He says, 'you have a box of needles, no?'....'um no', I say. So now I'm worried. We spend 5 mins talking about my concerns regarding live birth rates and reach the conclusion that if N and I make to embryo transfer x2 then we have a 30% chance of a live baby, at this clinic. 5% more than the live birth rate for a healthy couple. I'm happy and want to forget about numbers and get home to the fridge to look for these bloody needles.
Thankfully, the needles are in the box with the pen with plenty of spares and N arrives with parrilla (bbq) food and I tidy the drugs away in the fridge to make more space. We are staying in for the 1st time ever at NY and actually I'm glad. I don't want a whiff of a hangover tomorrow. I have decided to have my last alcoholic drink before treatment too and we share a bottle of red, recommended to us, (which costs around £2.80). We eat, reminisce about our time together and admit some of the disappointments too in not starting a family and facing this treatment. We are definitely lucky to be where we are though, life is otherwise good and we watch the crazy fireworks that people let off from their back yards, balconies and porches.
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